go.

Yeah, tried to sleep.  Too much to think about. What's the sales tax in Arizona anyways? (:

Sorry. Okay brain. Let's get untwisted.

You know what I find interesting?  The fact that a lot of the people in the bible died before the things promised to them from God were even fulfilled.  Not many of them were actually blessed with the opportunity to see the product of their perseverance first-hand.  No doubt they got to see it from the bleachers, but not from earth.

It's interesting that I cling at all to my dreams and desires here on earth when I most definitely will never come to a place where I actually feel fulfilled and sanctified.  No, no, that is what Jesus means when He says to build up treasures in Heaven and when Paul says to "fix your eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen, for what is seen is temporary and what is unseen is eternal."

So if I'm not supposed to focus on achieving my goals on earth, what's left for me?
I think the point I'm trying to make is that Jesus wants us to GO regardless of what it's going to get us.  Don't go thinking it's where you'll settle and make life as good as you can.  Don't go thinking that your whole world will fall apart if you don't get to where you thought you might like to be.  And don't not go because something is making you fearful or doubtful.

I think sometimes God just wants us to move.  Pick a direction, if I hit a tree, I try another way.  All while having faith that He'll show me when the tree's coming so I don't hit it too hard.  That could leave a mark and an hardened heart.  Enjoying life with loved ones in the meantime.  By that people will see God's work in me, because I trust Him to lead me through the forest.  It's just a deep breath and baby steps. Goodnight.

linger.

In the midst of a hectic morning, God began wooing me.

I had to go outside to grab something out of the car and I was pleasantly surprised when I realized what a pretty morning it was.  I lingered in the back yard, surrounded by junk and trash and the place I live called the desert, but it was all so beautiful to me for some reason.  I was listening, as a lover does. And I heard Him.  I heard Him in the wind that blew and the scoot of an airplane across the cyan sky.  My attention went to a bird singing the prettiest song I've ever heard. Birds are special to me because they always remind me of the passage in Luke 12 about the sparrows.  Not one of them is forgotten or falls to the ground without the Lord knowing.  My Lord was reminding me, once again, that I'm taken care of and that "the hairs on my head are numbered" and He watches out for me.  In vain, I asked Him to show me one of the birds I was hearing. I was asking for proof of the truth He was already reminding me of.  I waited but nothing happened for a good five minutes.  I smiled at my inadequacy and foolishness.  I knew I needed to have faith and not test God.  But just as I stepped to the back porch, my eyes caught the sight.

Beautiful wings against a crisp morning sky.

What makes this story awesome, and I choose to keep it between my Savior and I, is what I had requested the night before.
Let me just say this, God answers prayers however He feels that they should be answered.

Sometimes it's not how you expect and sometimes it's speechlessly more.